Mustn't grumble / Joe Bennett.

1 Going, Oh My God, Home 3 -- 2 In Pursuit of a Bowl 10 -- 3 Walking to Swans 22 -- 4 Wheels 34 -- 5 Old Stuff and Rooney 49 -- 6 Conceal Your Wants 62 -- 7 Writer Way 74 -- 8 Hoe Hoe 87 -- 9 Nice Place 98 -- 10 Banging in the Rain 106 -- 11 The Bloody End 116 -- 12 Dead Poet with Golf 127 -- 13 Afternoon Toggles 134 -- 14 Crusties and Teacakes 143 -- 15 The Tethered Goat of Happiness 153 -- 16 Cider with Romance 161 -- 17 Back to School 171 -- 18 Pork Juice 182 -- 19 Democratic Yawn 192 -- 20 Where they Borrow Whippets 199 -- 21 What a Lovely Pier 208 -- 22 Football for Girls 218 -- 23 Look What They've Done to Mah-Jong 225 -- 24 I Will Nae Have a Headache Tonight 232 -- 25 Across the Neck 241 -- 26 Wot Larx 250 -- 27 Up the Stump 263 -- 28 I Twitch 270 -- 29 Whatever You Do, Don't Smile 276.

Fifteen years ago, Joe Bennett left England for a holiday. Now it's time to come back. But how is the England of his memory different from the England of the motorway? Identikit High Streets, imported cheeriness ("Welcome to Sunny Grimsby!"), chicken tikka poker machine pubs -- things aren't what they used to be. But the longer Joe travels, the more he wonders whether things were ever what they used to be in England.